Time warped back to 1982

For nearly 48 hours, I was stuck in 1982. (The only thing I actually remember from 1982 was my brother entering the world and I no longer had mom and dad to myself. Other than that, the details are a blur …)

But, yesterday morning, the computer modem bite the dust.

Truthfully, up until yesterday, I didn’t even know what the purpose of the modem was. I just thought it was this tiny machine in the basement that blinked pretty green lights. I didn’t know it was the internet hookup.

And, I didn’t know it held my JOB in its gripe.

Literally, yesterday I was “this close” to having to drag myself, plus the twins, into the newsroom with me while I worked on my articles by deadline.

Thankfully, since the newsroom has graduated to 2012, they were able to download my articles from that disk-sticky thingy. (It has a real name, I just don’t know it!)

So, there I went, dragging the twins with me out from BFE to the “city” so I could make deadline.

Once we returned home, I walked the half-a-block to our mailbox to collect the same newspaper I work for because since I had no internet, I wasn’t sure what was going on in the world.

For the first time in years, I read the paper from beginning to end, minus the sports section because I could give a flying fig about sports.

And, this is what I learned after my day minus the internet:

• You can make a citrus salad using all sorts of citrus fruits – that is GREAT to know if I ever grow oranges, lemons, grapefruits or any other type of juicy-fruits.
• Our in-house food writer makes a mean ice cream cake – wonder if she could make me one just because I like them?
• My husband’s company took a nose-dive during some quarter. (You’d think HE would have told me that, but nope I had to READ about that tidbit.)
•  There is still a constant battle between Planned Parenthood and the Susan G. Koman Foundation – my guess is those bridges have been burned until the end of time. Way to go Susan!
• Crime is still going on.

AND …

• Idiots are still parenting because clearly in my 24-hour internet hiatus, no one has come up with a “If You Want To Be Parent, You Have to Pass This Test.”